As you may or may not know, 9 months ago my sister became pregnant with her first child and our family’s first niece / grandchild. Last week I posted about how she had been induced and was going into labor but have since deleted it because unfortunately things didn’t go as they were supposed to.
On Friday October 18 at 3:36 am my sister gave birth to the most beautiful little girl named Evelyn Ann. When Evelyn entered this world she was not breathing, but the nurses were able to get her breathing on her own. My sister was able to see her daughter before Evelyn was transferred to a children’s hospital. She held Evelyn’s hand and told her to be strong and brave, and that we all loved her. Unfortunately while Evelyn was at the second hospital she slowly got worse. Her lungs began to fill with blood, and her heart began to fail. At around noon that afternoon my sister and brother-in-law had to make the hardest decision of their lives. They chose to end Evelyn’s suffering, and gave Evelyn back to God.
While this was happening I just kept thinking that this had to be a bad dream. That I would wake up at any minute to hear that Molly just gave birth and everything went perfectly, but unfortunately that did not happen.
Looking back I keep remembering hearing my sister sobbing into my mother’s arms asking God not to take Evelyn, I remember my brother-in-law crying and asking why, on the day that should have been the happiest day of his life, he was having to plan his daughter’s funeral. I remember my dad looking at my mom and saying, with tears rolling down his cheeks, that this was the saddest day of his life.
These moments and so many more will never leave my memory. They leave me with a hole in my heart for my sister and brother-in-law that is sure to never fully heal, but rather get easier over time.
I keep trying to see the small silver lining to everything and it’s those thoughts that keep me going. Evelyn wasn’t in any pain, everyone from our family was able to hold her and say goodbye, the entire family was there to support my sister, and my sister and brother-in-law’s love is stronger than ever.
While we deal with this unimaginable pain it feels comforting to know we have a supportive and strong family who will always be there to help each other out.
We will all be alright and get through this horrible experience one day at a time, but for now no matter who your pray to, it would mean so much if you could keep my sister, brother-in-law, and Evelyn in your prayers while they deal with this tragedy.
If you would like to read more, or hear about this story from my sister / brother-in-laws perspective visit his blog: